There is only one way under heaven to get anybody to do anything.
Have you ever thought about that? It is by making the other person,
want, to do what you want them to do.
Of course, you can make
anyone hand over their watch or wallet, by pointing a gun in their face,
or an employer can force his employees to cooperate, by threatening to
fire them. Even a child will do as he or she is told if they are
threatened. But with these crude methods come undesirable repercussions.
Only
by giving you what you want, will you do as I ask, Is that not True?
The question is, What do you want? Sigmund Freud said that everything
you or I do, springs from two motives. Sexual desire, and the desire to
be great! Dr John Dewey another profound philosopher, phrased it in
these words "The Deepest urge in human nature is the desire to be
important", Yes, importance is something that man has always strived
for. Here is a thought for you to ponder, What do you want?
I
hesitate to say the majority of people would not want too many things,
but the few things you do wish, you crave, is this not true with most of
us. Think about it seriously.Some of these things could include:
Health and fitness,
Food,
Sleep,
Money and the things money Buys,
Life after Death,
Sexual Gratification,
The Well being of our children,
The feeling of importance.
Almost all of these wants are usually gratified except one.
Its almost as deep as the desire for food or sleep "The Desire to be Important" Lincoln started a letter saying "Everybody likes a compliment!" William James said, "The Deepest Principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated", He did not speak, of the "wish" or the "desire" to be appreciated.
Its almost as deep as the desire for food or sleep "The Desire to be Important" Lincoln started a letter saying "Everybody likes a compliment!" William James said, "The Deepest Principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated", He did not speak, of the "wish" or the "desire" to be appreciated.
A great man once said "I consider
my ability to arouse enthusiasm among people". The Greatest asset I
possess, and the way to develop the best in a person, is by appreciation
and encouragement.
"There is nothing else that so kills the ambitions of a person as criticisms, from superiors.
I try never to criticize anyone, rather I would prefer to teach someone in order to try to give that person the incentive to work.
"There is nothing else that so kills the ambitions of a person as criticisms, from superiors.
I try never to criticize anyone, rather I would prefer to teach someone in order to try to give that person the incentive to work.
Sometimes
you will find readers saying they have heard it all before, or' You
tried it all and it does not work, at lest, not for intelligent people,
they flatter themselves. And you would be right, flattery seldom works,
with discerning people. Flattery is usually shallow, insincere, and can
show selfishness on their behalf.
The Difference between Appreciation and Flattery?
Easy!
One is sincere, the other is insincere, one comes from the heart, the
other from the head, if all we had to do was flatter, everyone would
catch on, and we would all be experts in Human relations. Flattery is
easy to hand out, it can puff up the receiver and the one handing it out
as a compliment but appreciation on the other hand takes time. And
does not come as easy as we would like.
In my experience
appreciation comes with experience, and time, and usually comes when its
too late. We may at times believe, in ourselves, that we appreciate
certain things in life, but have a rude awakening when the thing, we
loved or person, we loved is taken from us. Only when one has
experienced, the school of hard knocks, can one truly understand the
word Appreciate.
